Another suicide…a beautiful life gone! A life that hadn’t even bloomed to full adulthood, still unsure and tentative about things around her. Every few days we hear about a student committing suicide reasons that may seem inane to us mean the world to them- love issues, problems coping up with studies, cyber bullying, peer pressure…and then we ask, “but why couldn’t she talk to me about it? I have always told her we are like friends and you can share anything with me. Then why?”

These are dangerous times. We face a problem of plenty- too much information, excessive dependency on gadgets, too many social media platforms and undue amount of peer pressure on children! The little amount of time that our children spend with us ( I say little as most of their time is spent in school or with friends on phone or in other classes), we try and become their ‘friends’ so that they  share their day  with us and we can feel connected to them! We teach them ‘good values’ indirectly, trying not to be too preachy and guiding them ever so subtly about the kind of company they should keep (subtly, for they will not hear a word against their friends).We attempt to keep up with them by listening to their music, even if it seems like cacophony to us and the shows they enjoy, another step to our deep bonding with them.

This makes me wonder, do we fear our kids? Are we ridden with fears that come announced, of shadows and darkness that may tail our children? When they show disinterest in academics, we quickly pacify them, ‘it’s ok as long as you just pass. No pressure on you!’ Despite perhaps our reservations, we talk about sex, boyfriends and making out. We act cool and try to guide them in our own ways, ‘hey! I should know when you kiss the first time, do share, I am your friend, right?’, all the time keeping our fingers crossed! We of course teach them good from the bad, right from the wrong, constantly reminding them we are there for them always, should they need us. At least I tell my daughters, “no matter how wrong you go, no matter to what extent, never fear to share with me.”, hoping they don’t understand my desperation to keep them safe and protect them.

I am a tensed and worried mother today. I thought motherhood had its challenges but This I don’t know if I am ready for, this fear that has wrenched its way into my heart. Are my daughters and all the children out there safe?

 

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